Continue reading »]]> WHAT’S PLAYING: Smilez and Southstar “Tell Me”

Long ago, when the world was young, there was a beautiful star named Bright Eyes, and she was the brightest star in all the heavens. After many years, another star entered the sky and hid Bright Eyes from view. This made her sad because people could not see her face.

So she called to her sisters, saying, “Come, let us go down to Earth where we can live with the people and make them happy. The new star has hidden my light and the sky does not need us any longer.”

On their way to Earth, Bright Eyes and her sisters stopped on Mount Joy where Uncta, the Great Bronze Spider, lived and spun the finest webs. The maidens begged the Spider God to teach them to spin and weave, and he agreed. Soon, they were able to spin beautiful threads and weave them into fine cloth.

One day, Bright Eyes decided that it was time for her and her sisters to continue on their journey, and she turned to Uncta for help.

“Will you help us get to Earth?” she asked the Spider God. “We want to teach the people how to spin and weave.”

Uncta was sad to see the sisters go, but he knew that they would bring much joy to the people of earth. He wove a basket and used it to lower them to Earth.

When Bright Eyes and her sisters landed, they became the Little Folk. They lived in the forest, working, dancing and playing. They taught the Choctaw how to make bright colors and use them in weaving their rugs and blankets. The Choctaw loved the Little Folk who helped them and Bright Eyes was happy again.

Whenever one of the Choctaw was sick, Bright Eyes and her sisters would go into the forest and pray to the Great Spirit to protect them. They told the people to pray to the Great Spirit as well.

All of the prayers went up to Sandlephone, who sat on a great ladder high in the sky. As soon as the prayers had come into his hands, they changed into lovely flowers. He closed the blossoms and dropped the seeds upon the earth while the perfume wafted on up to the Great Spirit.

The Little Folk cared for the seeds as they fell and from them sprang the wild flowers. This is why the Choctaw do not pick flowers.

They are tokens of love from the Great Spirit.

Continue reading »]]> WHAT’S PLAYING: Robbie Robertson “Ghost Dance”

When three strange women (one black, one brown, one white) arrive at a wayside inn called The Gaff and Slasher, Karsh, the innkeeper, takes them in against his better judgment. Two of the women—Lal and Nyateneri—are searching for their former mentor, a powerful magician who has summoned them to save him from destruction and worse at the hands of his most powerful pupil, Arshadin. The third, Lukassa, is a village girl whom Lal resurrected after she drowned and whose childhood love, Tikat, pursues the three, intent on regaining her. When these blighted souls converge on the inn, life there is forever changed as powerful forces wage ungodly battle for possession of the magician’s soul.

I first came across The Innkeeper’s Song ten years ago, and it’s still one of my favorite fantasy novels. Beagle is a masterful stylist, his narrative full of wonderful, unexpected metaphors and fierce musicality. There is poetry in this book few writers can manage, full of things left unsaid and subtle inferences. All of this comes together to weave a compelling story that is impossible to put down.

Told from various points of view, The Innkeeper’s Song is a multi-faceted fantasy, not just one tale, but several woven together seamlessly, flowing in and out of stream-of-consciousness. Hard to fathom, I know, but it works brilliantly because Beagle is a master of characterization. There is never any doubt who is talking, even when the differences are subtle.

In elegant yet simple prose, Beagle plumbs the nature of life, death and love by illuminating the shifting relationships among the various major and minor players (including an irascible shape-changing fox) who people this affecting tale.

Favorite Line/Image: My name is Karsh. I am not a bad man.

I am not a particularly good one, either, though honest enough in my trade. Nor am I at all brave—if I were, I would be some kind of soldier or sailor. And if I could write even such a song as that nonsense about those three women which someone has put my name to, why, then I would be a songwriter, a bard, since I would certainly be fit for nothing else. But what I am fit for is what I am, everything I am. Karsh the innkeeper. Fat Karsh.

They talk foolishness about me now, since those women were here. Since that song. Now I am all mystery, a man from nowhere; now I am indeed supposed to have been a soldier, to have traveled the world, seen terrible things, done terrible things, changed my name and my life to hide from my past. Foolishness. I am Karsh the innkeeper, like my father, like his father, and the only other country I have ever seen is the farmland around Sharan-Zek, where I was born. But I have lived here for almost forty years, and run the Gaff and Slasher for thirty, and they know that, every one of them. Foolishness.

Bottom Line: A fantasy masterpiece that has withstood the test of time, The Innkeeper’s Song is not to be missed.

Coming up next: The Peculiar by Stephen Bachman

Continue reading »]]> WHAT’S PLAYING: Salt-n-Pepa feat. En Vogue “Whatta Man”

The other day, I learned the hard way that—despite the black belts I’ve earned and the tough-girl image I try so hard to project to the world—when it comes to the creepy and downright bizarre, all my kick-assery flies out the window leaving nothing but a 6’2” crybaby.

This epiphany occurred while I was watching Cowboys and Aliens with some friends. I was fine until the alien’s body opened up to unleash a second set of hidden, gooey, three-fingered hands. My friends laughed.

Me? I went apeshit.

I scrambled as far away from the television as I could, squeezed my eyes shut, and alternated between grabbing at my friends and slapping their hands away, all the while shrieking, “No! No! No!”

Not my finest moment.

My friends weathered the storm as best they could—letting me know when the “scary” part was over, and then scattering to the far ends of the room whenever the gooey alien hands showed up.

Now, besides, yet another irrational fear to add to my long, long lists of phobias, I’ve decided to add another weapon to my arsenal.

I just have to figure out what to say to the bank when “chainsaw-katana” shows up on my credit card bill.

Continue reading »]]> WHAT’S PLAYING: Alicia Keys feat. Nicki Minaj “Girl on Fire”

Talk about an embarrassment of riches. The lovely and talented Kelly Johnson and Joy Johnson have both tagged me in the Next Big Thing Game. Make sure you check out their blogs!

1. What is the working title of your book?

Wildling

2. Who or what inspired you to write this book?

A couple of years ago, I learned that UNESCO (United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organization) lists my native language—Choctaw—as vulnerable to extinction, joining the list of the estimated 300 languages spoken in North America before the arrival of Christopher Columbus that are endangered or extinct.

This knowledge left me feeling sad, lonely, and more than a little angry. But it also left me with a curious question: What would I do, sacrifice, to save my race from extinction?

And Wildling was born. The story itself has changed a lot since I started playing around with the idea, but I like to think that part of the original inspiration is still present.

3. What genre does your book fall under?

Adult Fantasy

4. What is the one-sentence synopsis of your book?

A member of a nearly extinct magical race strives to protect a human child from various factions, including one led by another of her kind who is determined to kill the boy before he can be used to destroy the world.

5. Which actors would you choose to play your characters in a movie rendition?

Jessica Szohr – Mia Twinblades
When Mia stumbles upon a murder and kidnapping in progress, she finds herself caught up in a conspiracy of slavery and political intrigue. She must choose between the man she could come dangerously close to loving and the child that has captured her heart.

Noah Gray-Cabey – Connor
Intelligent and curious, Connor’s talent for boosting magic makes him a prize worth killing for.

Sir Michael Gambon – Lachlan Dilwyn
An ex-priest born with the gift of healing, Lachlan lost his magical abilities when he chose wine over his religion.

Henry Simmons – Luc Excer
A telepathic prince banished from his kingdom, Luc is determined to rescue his younger brother from Vadim and Irina at all costs, even if it means betraying his friends.

Gilles Marini – Vadim Aranka

Old and immensely powerful, Vadim is torn between his feelings for Mia and doing what he knows to be right. Connor’s very existence puts the kingdom in jeopardy. But will Mia forgive him for doing what needs to be done?

Blake Lively – Irina Aranka

As Vadim’s ward, Irina has been in love with him since she was a child. Now, with the ultimate tool within her grasp, she’s bent on having him for her own. And nothing, not even his growing feelings for Mia Twinblades, is going to stop her.

6. Will your book be self-published or represented by an agency?

I intend to seek representation and traditional publishing.

7. How long did it take you to write the first draft of your manuscript?

Two to three months. The revision process is taking much, much longer.

8. What else about your book might pique the reader’s interest?

An excerpt, maybe?

Cheval lunged forward and drove his sword into the old woman’s back. Blood splattered the boy’s horrified face. The grey haired woman crumpled to the ground.

Taking advantage of the distraction, Mia dove between Grimm’s legs, barely avoiding his claws. She rolled to her feet, spun around, and vaulted onto his shoulders. Putting one hand on top of his head and the other beneath his jaw, she twisted with all of her strength. The sound of Grimm’s neck snapping reverberated through the alley. He collapsed beneath her, already reverting to his human form.

Strangely disappointed now that the fight was over, she climbed to her feet and looked up just in time to see Cheval fire a crossbow. The arrow struck her in the chest, the force of it knocking her into the wall. She felt a brief sensation of rotten planks crumbling under her weight, and then she fell backward into the building. She lay there—unable to breathe, let alone scream—and stared up at the sky through the holes in the ceiling. The moon hadn’t even risen yet, but it was already shaping up to be a shitty night.

Then the roof came down on top of her.

9. Now comes the part where I’m supposed to tag other authors.
I’m not going to do that this time because I’m lazy. So, any of you out there working on new projects and would like to share, consider yourselves tagged!

Continue reading »]]> WHAT’S PLAYING: Duffy “Syrup and Honey”

Once upon a time, the Choctaw held a Green Corn Festival to show love and gratitude to the Great Spirit who had given them so much. The Queen of the festival was Lily Wanda, the most beautiful maiden in the village.

When time came for the Chief to speak, he stepped forward and the people fell silent.

“My people,” he said, “The Great Spirit has been good to us. Green Corn Goddess has watched over our corn. Rain God watered it and Father Sun warmed it. We give them thanks. I have long wondered where Father Sun sleeps. Someone must journey to find the answer. This traveler will face great danger and hardships. He may never return. But, if he can find the place, he will be great among men.”

After the Chief had spoken, the silence was unbroken but for the wind that sighed through the trees.

Finally, a brave young man named Oklawana stepped forward. “My Chief,” he said, “I will go and find where Father Sun sleeps.”

Lily Wanda cried out in distress. “No, no, do not go, Oklawana!” she said, pushing through the crowd to stand before her lover. “You will never return!”

Oklawana turned to Lily Wanda. “I must go. Our chief wishes it. I will return with great honor and claim you for my bride.” He took her hand. “I leave my wampum belt with you. It tells the story of our people’s councils. Guard it well until I return.” Then he made four bundles of sticks for the four seasons of the year. “Count these for me as the seasons pass.”

Unable to speak, Lily Wanda nodded and took the belt and sticks. The next sunrise, she watched her sweetheart start his long journey.

Every day, Lily Wanda prayed to the Great Spirit to send Oklawana back. She counted the bundle of sticks as the seasons passed. In the evenings, she sat in her doorway watching for his return. In time, she went up on the mountain and built signal smokes to guide her lover home.

Seasons passed and Lily Wanda grew old. She still counted the sticks and guarded the belt. She watched and prayed. One day as she prayed at the mound of Nanih Waiya, a stranger came to her.

“I saw the signal smoke and came to you,” he said. “Lily Wanda, do you remember me? I am Oklawana who went in search of the sleeping place of Father Sun. I have come back to you.”

“That is not true,” she replied. “Oklawana has been dead for many years. You are some other.”

“Is this the belt he gave you?” he asked, pointing to her waist.

“Yes, I have kept it for him but he does not return.”

“I gave you the belt. Don’t you remember me?”

“No, you are Halvah, the story teller. Let me be.” With these words, Lily Wanda died of a broken heart.

Oklawana caught her as she fell. He carried her body to the village and found that no one knew him.

“I followed Father Sun day after day, season after season,” Oklawana said wearily. “Finally, I saw him sink into a great blue lake, and I could not follow him. I have wandered many years trying to find my people, but you do not know me. My Lily Wanda did not know me. Now she is dead.”

Then he sank to the earth in despair and died of grief.

The people buried him and his faithful Lily Wanda together.

Continue reading »]]> WHAT’S PLAYING: Bo Durham “High School Party” (Yep, it’s that kind of book.)

This week’s book is Fifty Shames of Earl Grey by Andrew Shaffer a.k.a. Fanny Merkin.

Young, arrogant tycoon Earl Grey seduces the naïve coed Anna Steal with his overpowering good looks and staggering amounts of money, but will she be able to get past his fifty shames, including shopping at Walmart on Saturdays, bondage with handcuffs, and his love of BDSM (Bards, Dragons, Sorcery, and Magick)? Or will his dark secrets and constant smirking drive her over the edge?

Fifty Shames of Earl Grey is a parody of E.L. James’s series, Fifty Shades of Grey. For those of you unfamiliar with FSOG, James’s book started off as Twilight fan fiction and morphed into a story about a captain of industry (Christian Grey) who lures an unsuspecting college co-ed named Anastasia Steele into the world of BDSM.

The good news is that you don’t need to read Fifty Shades of Grey to enjoy Fifty Shames of Earl Grey.

I seriously could not stop laughing at the barrage of one-liners, irreverent jokes, and hilarious Twilight references throughout the book. Shaffer’s writing is fast-paced, fresh, and entertaining. His ability to comment on the clichés of erotic and romantic literature without seeming pretentious is nothing short of brilliant. He creates a hysterical mood that shatters the illusion of romance by overusing clichéd words. The word “gaze” appears to be one of his favorites.

From his man crush on Tom Cruise to his propensity for wearing a silver thong with pink crocs, Earl’s antics are hilarious and entertaining, and Anna Steele is the perfect straight woman.

Let me be clear, this is not an erotic novel. The magick themed sex scene in which Earl Grey pulls multi-colored hankies and a dove out of Anna’s lady parts will have you giggling nonstop.

Shaffer hits all the right notes in this parody. Can’t wait to see what he does next.

Favorite Line: “Ew,” I say. “Was that supposed to be sexy?”

“It was supposed to be. My dirty talk doesn’t turn you on?”

I shake my head. “Sometimes. But comparing a woman’s vagina to a fish is unacceptable.”

“What if I said ‘goldfish’? Goldfish are colorful and uniquely beautiful. Like you, my dearest Anna.”

I shake my head again. “Just stop. No fish.”

“Okay, then what did you have in mind?”

“Drop the double entendres and let’s move on to another F-word.”

“Oh, Anna,” he says. “I thought you’d never ask. Food it is, then! Let’s go eat in the dining hall.”

It wasn’t the F-word I had in mind, of course (it was actually two F-words: friending and Facebook), but it works. I’m hungry. Plus, I don’t even have a Facebook account.

Bottom Line: Fifty Shames of Earl Grey is relentless and shameless, in a good way.

Coming up next: The Innkeeper’s Song by Peter S. Beagle

Continue reading »]]> WHAT’S PLAYING: Timbaland feat. Justin Timberlake “Carry Out”

Long ago, when the world began, Hashtali—The Great Spirit—fashioned people and grasshoppers from the same yellow clay.

They woke in a deep underground cavern and walked to the surface through a long tunnel, emerging from the passage together. But the people were so much bigger than the grasshoppers, that they could not see the insects in the dark and trampled many of them, including the Great Mother Grasshopper.

Fearing they would be wiped out, the grasshoppers called out to Hashtali for help. The Great Spirit—who hears the cries of all living things—took pity on the little ones. He made the tunnel much smaller and turned the remaining people into ants so that they could no longer trample the grasshoppers.

The ants you see today are the descendants of those people. Don’t step on them!